On 15 February 1981 I wrote a song I called “Passed Out,” which is curious because I drank only coffee, juices, and water then, being that I was in the military and forced to run PT three days a week. On 29 June 1998, less than a year after we moved into Old House, I rewrote it a little, renamed it “Bar Room Buddies,” and that night I recorded it on my computer at my dining room table. It was raining, and I had a cold, but I did it in one take. I’d written many songs between 1973 and 1995, in competition with my oldest and dearest friend, Stoney, up in New England, but this one has always caught my attention as a fun, foot-tapping, perhaps even a knee-slapping tune. It was the last time I played a song on my guitar.
If you’d like to hear the gravelly-voiced and weary thumb-strumming MP3, you can download the mp3 below this article. It’s probably best listened to with headphones. I’m compelled to share it with others in this new decade, nearly twenty-two years hence, because why not? In the meantime, here are the words, with one more alteration, “lectures to ignore” instead of “lectures through a door,” and this is now the official version. The letters above the stanzas are the cords and where they’re played. Disclaimer: I was an Urban Cowboy in the early 80’s and listened to C&W, so this song is just genre and does not reflect my married life then or now.
G
If I ever lose my job
I think I’ll bum around
Sell all my stuff and live a while
Where I cannot be found
C
No grinding axes, no taxes
No bad news TV shows
G
A simple haven where unshaven
I can wear my favorite clothes
D
And find some bar room buddies
People who can love me when I’m drunk
G
If I ever lose my wife
I think I’ll settle down
Find a girl who likes the nights
And parties on the town
C
No more backbiting, no fighting
No lectures to ignore
G
Just simple flowers and hours
With someone who will adore
D
All my bar room buddies
People who can love me when I’m drunk
(Interlude):
C
Cause when I’m drinkin’ and sinkin’
Underneath my chair
G
I’m feeling youthful, get truthful
But they don’t really care
D
‘Cause we are bar room buddies
G
Always feeling cruddy till we’re drunk
C
And after midnight we feel right
We’ve smokin’ up a pack
G
We may be dizzy but still we
Aren’t ready for the sack
D
Until we stand up and fall down
And finally laying on the ground
G
Passed out
G
If I ever lose my life
I hope the world will find
It puts some folks on easy street
Gives others peace of mind
C
But I’ll still haunt them to daunt them
I’ll spook ‘em if I can
G
With lots of laughter from hereafter
Well, anyway it’s my plan
D
To find some bar room buddies
G
People who can love me when I’m drunk
(repeat Interlude)
D
And I like to stand up and fall down
G
And finally laying on the ground passed out
P.S. Yes, yes, it should be lying instead of laying, but I hate that grammatical mess. Lie, lied, and lying are fine for not telling the truth, though they should be spelled ly, lyed, and lying. But for moving something, including yourself, to a different position the words should be just as simple: lay, layed, and laying.
P.P.S. I decided to look up the newer name of my song online and found that Merle Haggard and Clint Eastwood sang a song by the same title in 1980. It’s pretty good. But the two are not related. And mine’s better.
