In our modern culture, our roots are shallow and weak. Mobility is more important than stability in this rapidly changing world. We often move for better employment, education opportunities, and benefits. Our families, although smaller than in the past, send only shallow roots down for every new employment adventure. Every time a family moves to another area, the process becomes easier and more routine. Since moving is more routine than in the recent past, modern individuals must introduce themselves to an entirely new neighborhood and workplace.
Obviously, we put our best foot forward by embellishing the importance of our own positions and successes. We continually become our own promoters leaving out failures, missteps, and humility. Our children lose contact with their relatives and friends on a regular basis which makes it even easier for them as adults to move anywhere that captures their fancy for their own employment.
The problem with the upward mobility lifestyle is that we start to believe our own self-promotions and rationalizations forgetting any problems we had to overcome to be successful. Our self-narratives become more and more skewed, removing all the hard times and help we received on our own journey to our present lifestyle. Once again showing humility for our personal growth is forgotten.
This journey of our own aggrandizement usually begins with a new parenting philosophy. Our career success often minimizes our involvement in building a positive and strong family environment. Throughout our lives, the family does not disappoint but just evolves into a different platform in the environment of our adult children’s lives. These various phases of our offspring, like their family’s growth, are some of the most important functions of the family system. The children of these families become the best parents they can be.
When people in general review their lives, it is easy to overlook or forget all the involvement and assistance of others. Strangers, friends and family members guide us in becoming successful. We are deceiving ourselves as too many of us are inordinately taking credit for our own success without realizing the contributions others have given in the accomplishments in every aspect of our lives. This is a false narrative that often leads the individual to ignore the others who have given a hand. Once we selfishly disregard all the assistance from our family and important people in our lives, we are creating a distorted version of them. The success that we were fortunate enough to accomplish was done with the assistance of many others is more accurate. Our parents, teachers, friends, heroes and many others have laid the foundation that inspires us to reach far beyond our wildest expectations.
All of us should honestly and humbly review our lives and thank our lucky stars for all those who helped us in establishing our goals and reaching them instead of falsely taking full credit for the entire process.
Giving credit to those who helped us accomplish our goals and dreams is the way we can redeem and build up a healthy foundation of humility in ourselves and pass it on to others. All people who have succeeded in their lives had many others who provided help and inspiration. By not being humble and acknowledging those who assisted us in our lives, we are creating a false and distorted picture of our triumphs and defeats. Humility is the key to keeping us on the track to success.
Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers and blogs, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. Dr. Maglio is an author of weekly newspaper articles, INVASION WITHIN and the latest book entitled, IN CHARGE PARENTING In a PC World. You can see many of Dr. Maglio’s articles at www.drmaglioblogspot.com.
