In the very early days of air travel, the 20s and 30s, it was simple. You boarded, chose a seat and that was that. Then, someone had the bright idea of offering two classes: First and Coach.
And First Class was over the top! I’m talking Pan Am’s Clipper seaplanes. They were the first to set the standard for onboard luxury in the air. It was called “a luxurious, premium travel experience” and was like being on a high-end ocean liner, with private sleeping rooms, separate male and female bathrooms, gourmet meals and exceptional service.
Fast forward to my Pan Am days (the ’70s and ’80s) and First Class was still the embodiment of luxury: soft, deep, leather seats 38,000 feet in the air, endless mimosas to sip, caviar and vodka on ice, and sometimes, depending on the route, there would be the upstairs dining room where the on-board chef would carve a lamb crown roast.
R.I.P. There isn’t any regular First Class anymore — at least not the sort that’s within the reach of us ordinary folk anyway. It has been eradicated; done away with in favor of what they now call “high-end” business class. Some airlines like to think they offer First Class, but, in reality, it’s been abolished, obliterated, canceled, set aside, struck off, eliminated, extinguished, got rid of!
Except perhaps for Etihad Airways. They really do offer a first-class experience. It’s called The Residence and is a suite of three rooms — a living room, a bedroom with a double bed and a private bathroom with a shower. The cost of travelling like this? Depending on the route, of course, it can cost as much as $25,000. Or a zillion air miles.
The truth is airlines continue to carve up airplanes into separate cabins and the passengers into the haves and the have-nots. They even have the gall to force the have-nots to walk through the haves’ cabin to get to their steerage class seat.
“The modern airplane is a social microcosm of class-based society” researchers at the University of Toronto found. “And the increasing incidence of ‘air rage’ can be understood through the lens of inequality.”
The study found “that not only are episodes of air rage increasing, but that they are much more likely to happen when there is physical inequality on the plane — that is, the first-class cabin versus economy—and situational inequality (when passengers are required to board through the first-class section).”
The study concluded “that the chances of air rage incidents in the coach cabin are nearly four times higher when there is a first-class cabin on the plane — the same odds as a nine-and-a-half hour delay. The data also showed that when passengers boarded through the front of the plane, through first class (as opposed to boarding from the middle of the plane), episodes of air rage in economy more than doubled.
Meanwhile, airlines continue to struggle to make a real profit and regardless of what classes are offered, air travel continues to degenerate. Nowadays we consider ourselves lucky if the person in front of you doesn’t recline his seat onto your knees or the person seated behind you decides to prop up his bare feet next to your head. And then there’s the food… and the baggage allowances!
My personal preference is Delta’s Comfort Plus. It boasts early boarding, just behind business class, offers dedicated overhead bin space, more legroom, drinks and premium snacks, meals on flights, — long-haul international and some domestic flights.
One still needs a Ph.D. to book a ticket these days. It’s all about points, travel miles and credit card rewards and fares with names like Saver, Blue Basic, Main Cabin, Comfort Plus, Premium Plus, Mint or Polaris. And that’s not all. Let’s not forget each airline’s unique names for their separate classes. Fancy names like Air New Zealand’s Pacific Class; Alitalia’s Magnifica; Virgin Atlantic’s Upper Class; United’s is Connoisseur Class whereas Canadian Airlines is a bland Canadian Class.
Certain airlines, whom I shall not mention, have a very singular class. It’s called On a Wing and a Prayer Class.
Sue Quigley writes regularly for the Hernando Sun. She can be reached at [email protected] or at 727.247.6308.
